I am the very proud owner of a 1986 Toyota Corolla Saloon as it is so extravagantly described in the Owner's Tax Manual or whatever the hell it is.....Yes, I am a virginal beginner............the dreaded L driver that everyone loves to bitch, curse and make ugly distorted facial expressions after....Yep....C’est moi. The driver who takes the corners with the careful precision of a plastic surgeon..the one who travels with 30 mph ease and wonders why other not so gracious drivers, in exasperation, overtake on life threatening bends!!!

It is truly the once in a lifetime experience.......being an L driver....until that certainty, confidence and cockiness that comes with knowledge.....I am an accommodating, considerate, safe addition to the roads and byroads of Connnemara. I dread to think of the day when I’ll pass an L driver out and curse and blind him/her out of it for driving at 20 mph!!! As you can see, I have adopted an attitude.......an L driver stance if you want. Perhaps I have a gripe or two or four!!! Perhaps, indeed I have a complex about my 1986 Toyota Corolla Saloon.

You see, it all started fairly harmlessly. I returned from my travels at Xmas...not exactly penniless but after five months living it up in Asia one is hardly expected to have wads of cash oozing out of them. I bluntly told my father that I wouldn’t last a minute without wheels but there was a definite price range in my car selection......This is what he came up with... Needless to say, I was initially ecstatic........I started motoring Easter Thursday...by the following Monday night, I had made it as far as Westport, a town 45 minutes away. I was damn proud of myself and my car, christened ‘Cammy’ by my Sister who prides herself on giving names to all inanimate objects. What really burst my bubble was my return journey from Galway last Tuesday.

Myself and my aforementioned sister drove in the night before to attend a gig in the ‘Roisin Dubh’, an exciting live music pub venue. Friends of ours were playing there and after meeting them in the Shetland Islands a few weeks ago and promising them that we’d catch up with them, we really had to fulfil our promise. A wonderful night was had by all and our return journey back to the wilds of Connemara was going smoothly enough until.....we were on our way out of Oughterard. I had just gone into 3rd gear and was moving swifly into 4th..when an 1998 D car attempted to overtake me on a corner. Gosh, was I fit to be tied!!!!! A vehicle was coming in the opposite direction so your WAN was unable to pass. After the other car flew past, I indicated, slowed down and gave her the glare of the century. She finally got her butt into action and sped off into the Connemara countryside. I muttered unutterable comments about the driver and her car..and of course her assumed county of birth, the dreaded Dub down for the weekend obviously ... say no more!!!

Anyway, later on that night....my annoyance subsided and I was left with that bitter aftertaste of jealousy ...I wanted a 1998 car.....Yes, the Eldest Child Syndrome attacked. The following morning, I took another look at my 1986 banger and decided that I couldn’t get rid of it.....it is my first car....MINE, and even if it isn’t a 1998, it’s in fairly good shape...gets me from A to B and has its own unique character....the windows don’t really open........It gets upset and whinges if you attempt to challenge it into 5th gear!!

All these endearing features makes me realise how lucky I am. Everyday, I will repeat to myself....."Cammy, you’re my number 1." Yes, I’ll still throw a tantrum every time a 1998 car attempts to show me and Cammy up but I’ll be secure in the almost certain knowlege that THEY aren’t on first name terms with THEIR car!!!!!!

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Also by Ita Kane:
'Truelight' Adventuring
Storm on the Titanic: Interview with Patrick Murphy from Gaelic Storm
Traumatised L driver seeks other traumatised L drivers
B+B hoopla, rootseekers and Leaving Cert memories
New Year Blues in November
Bog Week Splendour

Read Ita's travels in the Far East
From East to West

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